Interview with DJ Silver (Patrick McGroin) by Daniel Ryan

Interview with DJ Silver (Patrick McGroin) by Daniel Ryan

How long have you been a DJ for?

I've been a DJ for 11.5 years now. I started this journey on 12/7/2013 and love every minute of it.

What do you think of Asphyxium zine? It’s been around for a long time and has had many interviews with some great people.

I love all the interviews they have and the reviews. I feel like I learn a lot when I check out the site and the material.

What is your favorite piece of equipment to work with? Or to play on?

I enjoy my Heil microphone and Sennheiser headphones.

What stations have you played with before if any?

I have not done any in person stations but all virtual through the web. Over the years I have probably been on air for 25+ stations. I love reaching anyone who wants to have good entertainment and music.

If you had to layout all the stations in order you played in as a timeline what would they be?

Wow – I don’t think I could do that – I have played for so many. Whats so great about the stations is they all offer a different audience, management and overall vibe. M y very first station was The Rock Asylum. It was such a great station and group of DJ’s and I have done nothing but built relationships over the years for the other stations.

What is the coolest experience you have had as a DJ?

I would have to say getting to connect with bands and owners. That is where the basis starts for this. I want to make sure I represent the music they work hard to bring to the masses. I have had the chance to be live on air for events at fairs, at bars and even doing my show on a terrestrial station (live FM radio).

What inspires you to keep doing what you do?

Simply for the love of the music and just helping peeps forget their worries in life and focus on good music. Music is therapy for the soul!!

If you had to name some influences, what would they be?

As far as being a DJ, I don’t know if I have any influences since I beat to my own drummer. Ive worked with some of the best internet radio DJ’s in the business and I have learned a lot from them. I loved working with Rich Embury and Chris Tatts. All the owners are amazing and allow me to do my thing.

What is your favorite venue you been to or been a part of?

As a DJ, I have not been to any venues for this gig. I have been invited out by bands both to come to their shows and also sent merch for the band. I would love to do this full time but have never had that opportunity. Maybe the day will come before they bury me.

To sum up this interview where can we find your latest airings and any shout outs to anyone for the readers of Asphyxium zine?

You can find me on facebook at https://www.facebook.com/DJSilverSurfer4U or my DJ page at https://www.facebook.com/DJSIlverChromeMetal. I am also on X at https://x.com/DJSilver812 and my podcast be found at https://www.mixcloud.com/pat-mcgroin/.

I want to give a BIG shoutout to all the owners of the stations that allow me to broadcast on their station, to the fans and listeners who tune me in and support me and to the bands for their music.

-Daniel Ryan

Interview with Michele Malavasi by Dave Wolff

Interview with Michele Malavasi by Dave Wolff

It has been long since you contributed poetry and reviews to Asphyxium (as Abyss Forgottentomb). How have you been occupying your time since then, and what projects are you currently working on?

Well, several personal issues were fixed, I moved to another flat, have a normal boyfriend for five years now. We are both bipolar and I am also hyperactive (is it the correct word?), I mean I can't stand to be not busy, I need to be busy and my brain never stays calm, haha. I mean that I need to think and imagine a lot to be really inspired. Stagnation is not my cup of tea. It was fun to participate for Asphyxium zine, and it has helped me a lot for the grammar. I wanted to get a job as a funeral adviser but the price to get this job is very expensive. Since I like death in a poetic way, I have decided to be inspired by Vincent Price and Tim Burton. I have started to create animated/stop motion videos. It's funny to see how it works to make a doll come to life. The movie “King Kong” in black and white is a good example. It takes several days until your movie is ready. I'm interested in stop motion creations, it's my new goal: I want to create stop motion videos. I also play music using Musescore 3, a piano application and some free soundfonts (harpsichord and piano).

You can listen to my Youtube music channel, I have for the moment one track on Spotify named “Crépuscule ET Ciel Nocturne” (it means Dawn and Nocturnal Sky). I always play sad, disturbing music, joyful things are not for me.

What appeals to you more when it comes to sad and disturbing music than music that is joyful? Are you able to sense its inherent beauty or does it convey something personal to you? How would you define sad music and disturbing music?

My own sadness and the beauty of the night inspire me a lot, it makes my spirit fly in some ways. Sad music is a way to express dark art, animated videos. I can also be happy and play sad music because it talks to my soul more than happy music. Music is much than words and it help to reach darkness that sad people do not want to explore. Dark and sad music is a hidden path that belongs to our personality. Between dark and light, there is something to explore, equilibrium of senses. When it comes to disturbing music, it reminds me of old black and white horror movies and some metal bands like Vader, Carcass and many others. Dark music is a way to explore myself through my hidden darkness.

How much have you improved your poetry writing since you last submitted it to Asphyxium? In what capacity have you been able to write lately?

I have not written poetry for a long time, but I have played some music instead of writing words. I transpose poetry to music because I actually feel inspired by deceased classical artists like Scarlatti, Bach, Beethoven, and I have another inspiration by Verne Langdon. Music is words we cannot express easily, in my opinion.

How would you describe the characteristics of death and morality that resonate with you, and how do you see them reflected in the works of Vincent Price and Tim Burton?

Death is a part of life and we must accept it as important because when it comes to a dead animal, flowers and other plants can grow. The soil works with the corps to make things grow, flowers, mushrooms, etc. If you love death you cannot despise life except if life is shit because of big problems. To me, Death is a creative entity, from bones grow flowers, this make me think about La Santa Muerte that I admire a lot. A lot of Mexican bands adore death as a part of life. Without life death does not exists and without death can’t exist life. Death and Life are like yin and yang, they are complementary and between both there are shadows (penumbra), I don't know the correct word. There's a part of life in death and a part of death in life, that's why I compare both to yin and yang. It's a wheel of destiny.

About Vincent Price and Tim Burton, they play with their vision of deeds, despair, sadness, because in my opinion they see the same way as me. Death is a piece of theatre like life and we are actors. Most of the people are asleep and not a loke are awake.

Vincent Price and Tim Burton understand monsters like me and some others, they play with people's fears and this is funny. Bela Lugosi is also one of my favorite because in some ways he represents his own contemporary time.

How do your views on mortality and your preference for dark and sad music come through in your stop motion videos and musical interpretations of poetry?

I create puppets with some pieces of bones or other materials, then I take pictures from each movements with my tablette. I do the same kind of thing by using sketchbook using calcs of each movements, then I put all together in the video app named power director. I do not have big engines to do the work as great movie makers but it's stunning to see it's possible with small materials. Everybody can do it if they want to create. Creativity has no limits. It's the animated Vincent movie that has given me the opportunity to create stop motion videos and Scarlatti/Bach/Verne Langdon for the creepy music. I like to interpret death this way because it's an important part of life. Sadness is a part of life as well. Without darkness, life would not exist, and without joy darkness would not exist as well. I like to explore dark existence because people are afraid of their own darkness which is a part of the living.

How did you go about finding equipment for recording music? In order to create stop motion animation, what equipment do you use, and how does it help you achieve your desired results?

To record music, I simply use piano applications and Musescore 3 on my laptop, then I can send to Youtube .And the only equipment I use is my tablette and my laptop. And Sketchbook. I have the images I desire because I pay attention to details. It's funny to play with dolls image by image with a simple tablette and sketchbook. 🙂

How do you think Bela Lugosi's role as a horror villain in movies such as "Dracula", "White Zombie" and "Son of Frankenstein" continues to resonate with horror fans today?

Well, he's a great reference as a villain, as Dracula. I watched “Vampire Over London” many months ago and I found it funny with Mother Riley. This actor is capable of scaring people because his roles are convincing; he played perfectly. Nowadays movies are a bit boring. Old movies are more magical with a few equipments. It's the magic of cinema, nowadays it's too much special effects and the stories are not as they used to be. Bela Lugosi is dead, it's a tragedy but he's still haunting his fans because he's an iconic symbol of old horror movies.

Has the overuse of special effects and CGI in modern movies contributed to your interest in older films for inspiration, or have you always preferred the classic eras? How did the first "King Kong" film capture your attention and inspire you to become interested in stop-motion?

Well, it's important to know the basics that came before the new technics, of course I am interested in how “Aliens” (H.R Giger) was made in the movies, as the case for “King Kong”. New technologies are important if you know the older processing of special effects. Cinema, new or older, is a scene full of illusions we name special effects. I hope someday I will be more talented as my idols. But to tell the truth, I have always had a preference for the oldies special effects even if I can admit that some new effects are really impressive and interesting. It's another way to enjoy one's job.

I have always had a preference for the classic eras. For example, the way “King Kong” was made is a very interesting process, and this is also the reason why I want to create stop motion videos.

What appeals to you personally about classical composers such as Scarlatti, Bach, and Beethoven? Verne Langdon: who is he, and how did his work inspire you?

To me, Scarlatti, Bach and Beethoven are as dark as Edgar Allan Poe and Baudelaire; that's why they are some of my favorite musicians. Verne Langdon was a musician and inspired me a lot with “Vampire to the Harpsichord” and “Music for Magicians”. You can find his albums on Youtube, it's more like cinema music, like his other music “Carnival of Souls”. It's important to have a colorful palette of musicians, movies, especially for the inspiration. I can be inspired by shadows on the wall and sceneries I imagine, and say to myself “what a nice idea”.

In listening to “Vampire at the Harpsichord,” what are some of the movies that come to mind?

One movie especially, it's interview with a vampire starring Tom Cruise and Brad Pitt and of course (even if it's less impressive) the movie of Dracula (1931). The whole album make me think about the movie “The Pit and The Pendulum” starring Vincent Price long ago.

Are there any other death metal or extreme metal bands that you have been listening to besides Vader and Carcass? Over the years, have you observed any changes in extreme metal?

Recently I have listened to Cathedral’s “In Flames”. It's a bit different for death and black metal but they sound great. One title has helped me a lot “Release The Pain” and “Not A Vampire Song”. There are not so many old school bands nowadays, but the influences are still there so it's cool.

For a similar effect, do you also listen to radio serials or horror programs? There are quite a few streaming on YouTube, some of which date back to the 1930s. Have you listened to any that you would like to share?

Long ago I used to listen to Pierre Bellemare. He was French and told thriller stories on TV. I have never heard him on the radio, but I would like to.

What do you do when you compose your music using Musescore 3 to arrange the piano and harpsichord sounds?

There are arranged sounds so I use the keys and imagine the music I hear in my mind. Then I can save it into mp3, wav, flac etc. Someday I would like to try to write metal music with Musescore 3.

Since you released “Crépuscule et Ciel Nocturne”, what kind of feedback has it gotten? Also, you just released “A Titre Posthume” at Youtube Music. Can you describe this track and the inspiration behind it?

“Crépuscule et Ciel Nocturne” has been approved and available on Spotify but not a lot listen to it. I'd like this track to be heard worldwide “A Titre Posthume” is all about my sadness and loneliness and was inspired by Scarlatti and Max Ablitzer (Youtube).

I noticed that you display your work on your Facebook profile. What is the extent of your portfolio that can be viewed there? Is there a community page as well as your profile?

I have Instagram, Soundcloud and Facebook. One title you can hear on Spotify, and most are available on Soundcloud and Youtube Music.

Are you planning to create an official website to showcase your work in addition to your profiles on the sites you mentioned?

I'd like to create an official website but I don’t know how I must proceed to and for this I need help to have an official Facebook page but I think I must have CD on stores and a lot of followers or fans.

When you have designed enough material to include in a book or eBook, are you contemplating publishing your artwork? Are you considering releasing your music on compact disc?

I'd like to put my music on compact discs but my laptop do not have a CD thing. I will see if it's possible to do it at the local library since they have computers .It's not that I admire my artworks but some of them fit some music I have written.

https://audiomack.com/merkredikitosk

https://www.instagram.com/selenaiolaptite/

https://www.facebook.com/SelenaIoLaPtite

https://soundcloud.com/merkredi-kitosk

https://www.youtube.com/@merkredikitosk

https://open.spotify.com/artist/2kjiqERpiUzssCluTIEMXf

-Dave Wolff

Interview with artist Salman Aziz (second interview) by Dave Wolff

Interview with artist Salman Aziz by Dave Wolff

I first interviewed you in 2019 when you were promoting your poems, short stories and your independent film “Lost in the Black Hole”. What have you been doing since then?

Ah! I really can't believe that I will be here once again getting interviewed by you! Seriously, I just can't explain how excited I am to be part of this meeting! Literally, I am grateful for that. Because the last time, this is the only magazine where I openly and explicitly talked about my work and life that I hardly spoke to others!

Since 2019, I did lots of things. Lots of magical moments happened during that time. And, at the same time, I had gone through some worse times.

The end of 2019 turned out as a lucky charm for me. Because after that, I gained a little worldwide recognition which I was seeking for the last decades!

My film Lost in the Black Hole, got a nomination under the Tareq Shahriar Best Independent Shorts Award (the most reputed award for Bangladeshi Young & Aspiring Filmmakers) from the 15th International Short & Independent Film Festival, one of the most prestigious film festivals in Europe, Asia, and the American continent. It felt like one of my sweet dreams that came true!

In 2020, I made an alternative version of the film with lots of VFX and symbols to make it more and more enigmatic and bold. And, yes! From 2020 to 2021, it also won awards from reputed international film festivals!

Alongside this small success, 2020 was a horrible year for my mental breakdown. I truly went through lots of suffering from my physical and mental health. Somehow, I was able to cope with it.

After taking an overlong break from writing, I returned with my 2nd book in 2021, Bold and Bitter Statements: Volume 1, where I narrated my philosophical views about life, the human mind, nature, and the world. And, its 2nd volume came out in 2022. Now I am onto music and planning to do films. And, many books are lined up to come out.

So overall I am kinda busy with my work and life!

Did you expect “Lost in the Black Hole” to be nominated for the Tareq Shahriar Best Independent Shorts Award when you released it? How did that nomination turn out for the film?

Once Lady Gaga said, “There can be a hundred people in the room, and 99 don't believe in you, but one does.” This excerpt is also applicable to me.

I never imagined that I could get the nomination! I submitted my film to more than a hundred film festivals in to hope that they will like it. But one after another rejections, I already put in my mind that I and my creation won't ever be accepted and appreciated by the people. Then this wonderful thing happened. I got an email that my film is nominated. I still couldn't believe it and sent them an email for ensuring. And boom, finally karma turned into real!

In the 15th ISIFF, more than five thousand films were submitted for the festival but only a hundred were selected. And from them, only six films were chosen for nominations in each different category. I couldn't believe my film would be there! I made my film with a mobile camera whereas other filmmakers used film cameras to shoot their films. Their films were highly professionally edited whereas I edited my film all alone. They had professional actors for the film whereas I acted in my own film. After this what can I expect? For me getting this nomination from the most reputed international film festival is a huge big thing!

In what ways is the alternate version of “Lost in the Black Hole” with its additional VFX different from the original? Why did you decide to make this new version of the film and how did audiences respond to it? At which film festivals did it win awards?

There is an old proverb, "Artists are never satisfied with their creations." Each time they want to modify more and more to make those perfect. In 2019 when I finished my film, the visuals were very raw and mysterious. But in 2020, I thought I must creatively make it more enigmatic. In this case, Madonna's Bedtime Story M/V influenced me to put VFX. I found the symbols can clearly refer to many things so that the viewers can interact with the artist's expression of mind. Before putting those symbols in my film, I studied a lot to gather information about them and also learned how to use VFX in Adobe Premiere. It was a very challenging task for me because for the first time I did that! When I got good feedback from the reviewers, it felt like all my pains show the colors of joy. And mostly I was over the seventh sky when the Lebanese people loved my film and voted to get the Audience Award.

Already I claimed that this type of film was never made in my country. For ensuring my mind, I applied to the cultural ministry to verify that is it true or not. And my doubts were gone when the ministry office's copyright section declared and certified it as authentic by creation and the first short film in the symbolic mysterious experimental category.

After participating in the bi-yearly festival the ISIFF, I mostly submitted my film to monthly film festivals, because I didn't have much patience to wait for a year to get the notification. I know the list is little but here I'm gonna share where I got selected, nominated, and awarded.

Official Selections:

Best Experimental Short Film, International Short & Independent Film Festival, 2019.

Best Cinematography, Mozi Motion Film Festival, 2019.

Best Experimental Short Film, Austin After Dark Film Festival, 2019.

Best Experimental Short Film, Dadasaheb Phalke International Film Festival, 2019.

Best Short Film, Lift-Off Global Network Sessions 2021.

Best Experimental Short Film, Hallucinea Film Festival, 2021.

Best Experimental Short Film, Direct Monthly Online Film Festival, 2021.

Nominations:

Tareq Shahriar Best Independent Short, 15th ISIFF, 2019.

Best Horror Short Film, Berlin Flash Film Festival, 2021.

Awards:

Best Mystery Film, Indie online film award (Season 3), 2021.

Best Halloween Originality, Brazil International Monthly Independent Film Festival, 2021.

Best Experimental Short Film and Audience Award, Monthly Indie Shorts, 2021.

Although I got this little success and hold a title, still I think I didn't get much recognition that I deserve especially from my country. And every time it hurts me a lot when it comes into my mind. Maybe I am not a big well-known star that's why I got a handful of media coverage!

Altogether it appears to be an impressive list, if you add the selections, nominations and awards together. For a new filmmaker from an industry that’s not as well known, you seem to be getting a good start making a name for yourself. Have other filmmakers or festival organizers taken notice of your awards since you received them?

I am thankful for these sweet words you used to compliment me. It means a lot to me!

Ah, I don't think the list is quite impressive to me! The day when I will get any award or nomination from the Oscars or Golden Globes, then I will take myself as an achiever! Though “Bloody Dark Dream” is my very first film, as a film festival participant “Lost in the Black Hole” is my first film in that way.

To be honest, if the film is made by a well-known maker like Nuhash Humayun, definitely the person will get all kinds of well-treatment from the entertainment world than me! Because this industry is run by fame, power, and money! It doesn't mean I am feeling envious or grumbling too much!

But yes, what I truly deserve, I didn't get that much! The reason is I am just an indie artist, not from a big production house or owning any label! Everywhere still, never-ending cronyism and nepotism are happening. Nowadays a handful of people respect true art and artists!

But I am truly grateful to them, who understood and felt my mind and appreciated my very hard work! When I think about that, it gives me the energy to do more work and go forward. A little appreciation really matters to artists like us! Because small support and love may boost the mind of the artist to create something rare!

After getting the winning tag, I got enormous invitations from film festivals to attend. My email and Instagram hold the evidence of those words! I think it is a blessing from God that I got this recognition as a filmmaker and artist worldwide! Very often the festival organizers contact me to submit my film to their festivals, even many of them privately offer me various percentages of discounts for submission fees. The respect now I am getting from them, I never got in my entire life. According to my thought, to give birth to something aesthetic, all artists, authors, and filmmakers should break the wall of rivalry among themselves and work side by side!

The industry has changed in the last decade. Hollywood is running out of ideas and adopting cancel culture to push many of their movies, independent film is on the rise and social media generates more review profiles. While Hollywood still runs on money, it’s not quite as prominent anymore. Are there indications you’ve seen that the indie industry in your country is growing?

It’s a good sign that the wind of change is blowing everywhere! Though the wind blows like a storm somewhere or maybe like a gentle breeze. The thing is happening because of boredom to see the same kind of stories in the films. Now people are interested to see quality-oriented films, not acted by multi-stars. And I think most indie filmmakers make such kinds of movies. They mostly cast talented actors who can carry the characters really well! They make films that carry special messages to everyone that are related to society and even people can relate their everyday life to the films. In indie films, the budget is low or limited, that's why social media plays a vital role to promote the film. It is also a great medium to contact artists and makers. And in this digital era, everything becomes easier because of social media! Though it has negative sides also!

In my country, the majority of people prefer commercial films for entertainment. They have created a group where they only follow a specific star or superstar. But nowadays things are changing due to the taste of the new generation. Indie films are now taking a place in the heart for their good stories. Though they hardly meet with commercial success or get much theater for screening than commercial films! In short, the change is a slow process but it is gradually happening!

Do you know of any indie film companies showcasing self-produced movies on social media sites such as Youtube? What’s your view of some of them?

Yeah! I know some but I don't wanna mention them. Though they are indie film companies, they have made a cluster where they prefer only the known people around them just like commercial companies. And that's all I can talk about them! These days they are releasing their works on OTT platforms besides Youtube or Vimeo so that they could earn! Now I have to cross my fingers, tape my mouth and work on my own!

Did you happen to meet any indie filmmakers at any of the film festivals you attended? People you might correspond and perhaps collaborate with?

People are scared to work with me! Hahaha, I was kidding! Actually, collaboration becomes easy when both parties have similar points of view! But in my case, even though I got collaboration offers, I turned those down because my artistic way is far different than others! If I get any opportunity to work with an enthusiastic artist who has a deep affection for the art world like me, I will definitely team up for creating the best!

While attending the 15th ISIFF in 2019, I met a young ambitious filmmaker! But our conversation was limited to “hello, how do you do?” Yeah, we talked a little about our films but found he was unheard of dark art and symbolism ever! His filmmaking way and genre are different from mine! He makes films on happy stories with verbal dialogue.

In the time of the global pandemic, the rest of the festivals took place virtually. It was a relaxing situation for me because even if I got the invitation due to visa costs and other stuff, I couldn't bear those! But it doesn't mean in future I won't go if I get a call from the festival.

During the occasion, I met a few filmmakers online who are fascinated to work with me, if I will be available in their countries! They loved my work and devotion to the art. Even I got an amazing proposal to act in their films as an actor! I was just wowed! It was a big surprise for me! But for now, let it keep for the future!

Name a few of the filmmakers you have befriended online recently, and name any of the movies you’ve had a chance to watch by them?

I am a kinda introverted person! I mix with them with whom I feel comfortable and free. I have plenty of filmmakers, artists, models, and actor friends on my Facebook and Instagram, but I hardly talk to them. Mostly they watch my artistic activities and sometimes they applaud.

But yes, I have good communication with Indian filmmaker Amit Chauhan on Facebook. He is such a nice person with good behavior. He made many short films, TV commercials, and music videos from his own production house. From his short films, I got a personal invitation to watch one of the films, titled Identity (2020) online. Another short film I watched was Stay Alive still available on YouTube. People can watch this amazing film on mental health.

Once I approached him if he is planning to make any short films with a bold character, then consider me for that bold role! He also agreed to take me if he makes any bold films in the future.

A handful of people know about my acting taste and what type of character I would love to play. I always dream to play the most challenging, boldest, and toughest character in films. It may sound awkward to people but yes, I am gonna share some of my preferable roles.

I would love to play a role of a prostitute who is a victim of human trafficking like Sold (2014), Taken (2008), and Trade (2007). Another role I want to play is a victim of child abuse or something like that. I found these are the most intensively painful roles to play. I also want to do films on mental health where I can play the role of a psycho or depressed person or some sorta role according to the plots. If I ever get to act in horror films, I won't say "No"! Horror and mystery films are my most loveable films. But I don't like romantic films and neither have any interest to do such films.

For the filmmakers, I am always open to every kind of role, but I have some major terms and conditions. I won't do any lip-kissing or intimate scenes (sex scenes) ever. These two are my top priority on the agreement list. I have no problems doing any frontal or back nude scenes but must be relevant to the story parts.

I know my interest is different from others. But if the story is heart-touching and carries special messages, I won't refuse the film even though the budget is low or limited. I would love to work for free if the makers have great intentions in the art world!

What feedback have your movies received online? How about reviews or interviews in other zines?

The feedback was kinda mixed! My film is not yet on any public platforms, but I personally showed it to some of my friends and others who expressed their interest to watch it. According to them, it is really a mysterious film and complexly made! After explaining the context, then they admired my perspective and knowledge. Similar responses came from the film critics also! They called me a critical and deep thinker which I found cool and took that as appreciation.

Film reviewer and coordinator from Austin After Dark Film Fest, Michael Williams shared his thought, “It did indeed feel very ‘dream-like’.”

Whereas Asian Movie Pulse reviewed it as, “Filled with impressive visual aesthetics and fine avant-garde surrealism but way too confusing in the process, ‘Lost in the Black Hole’ works mainly as a piece of artistic composition than anything else.”

Film analyzer N. Khouri (Ph.D.) explained, “Lost in the Black Hole was anything but a ‘cliché’, the work of writer/director ‘Salman Aziz’ proved to be of a higher standard and worth watching over and over again.”

Though the genre of my film is different, so the opinion may vary from person to person! The thoughts come out as how a person feels and takes it!

The list of my media appearances is not that much great! But wherever I appeared, all the time I tried to represent my country well! Because as an author and artist from my motherland, it is my duty to introduce our talents all over the world!

Here are some printed and digital platforms where I took part in interviews.

1. The IndieView (as an author)

2. MIS Magazine (as a filmmaker and actor)

3. BIMIFF Magazine (as an artist and filmmaker)

4. The Writers and Readers Magazine (as an author)

5. Write 2 Be Magazine (as an author)

I mostly interviewed as an author! Here people mainly learned about my writing voyage but less about my artistic life. I hold both identities and I want people to recognize me by those!

At what point did you decide to resume writing? Were any of your personal experiences channeled into “Bold and Bitter Statements: Volume 1” besides your philosophical life views?

After publishing my book "6th September" in 2017, I was kinda lost and I couldn't find anything to write! Maybe it happened due to writer's block and my mental breakdown. I always wanted to create something unique rather than usual things! And still, I do!

Bold and Bitter Statements was my long-time planned and wanted to publish it in my final days. Then I realized, "what if I die today then who is gonna publish it? It will stay forever in the basket!" The book was supposed to hold only my verses about life, nature, and the human mind. But after that thought, I decided to chunk into volumes and publish it in my living days.

Another thing that came into mind to make it more distinctive is that I should include images as metaphors to make my point of view more understandable. Actually, using metaphors and symbols in all my works is my eminent style. In this case, the admirable artist Taylor Swift's artistic creations influenced me greatly! And this way, Bold and Bitter Statements was born in 2021 for people with great knowledge.

While writing the book, I made it in such a way that people can correlate them or anyone or anything with my analytical thoughts. People should know that I only write from reality! Mostly my rational thoughts come when I have gone through those circumstances. And the rest of the things I perceive from others' actions. Very few know that I didn't grow up in a healthy and happy family. From childhood, I'd passed the worst phases of my life. Maybe that's the reason to become mature at my immature age. Because actuality made me think deeply! And these verities are the prime cause of my depression at an early age which turns into Major Depressive Disorder (MDD).

In this book, my statements may be comparatively short for people, but the meanings are very vast! Each time they read; they will get different interpretations from different perspectives. Sometimes this explanation can be forthright and sometimes secretive. To perceive the knowledge behind it, people must think deeply about each of my verses.

In what ways did you relate to Taylor Swift and her work to the extent where she became a major influence on your writing? How are you use of metaphors and hers similar?

I have no words to talk about Taylor Swift! Seriously, she is damn cool!

Taylor is a complete package of all the talents. From singer to songwriter, performer, director, and doctorate degree holder, she has everything! And her journey made a great history, from American sweetheart to venomous snake to rainbow butterfly, she can be anything she wants! I admire her as an artist, but it doesn't mean I am a blind follower of her or Swifty or Taylor nation!

Actually, I didn't know about her till 2013. My cousins often used to mock me for being skinny due to my eating disorder. And all the time they compared me with Taylor's earlier health. It hurt and led me to hate her. After gradually knowing her, I began to like her for some music. When her “Bad Blood”, “Style”, and “Wildest Dreams” came out, her unique music-writing skills and clever presentation of music videos influence me to work on authentic projects. Especially her cryptic messages delivered through metaphors in her music and video are the major inspirations for me to use figurative expressions and figure of speech. And after seeing her music videos from the Reputation album, my interest developed much more in her. Though we don't have that much similarities, we both have our own individual styles to exhibit our works. Mostly her works are sometimes sweet, sometimes sour, and sometimes bitter but in my case, most of my works are the darkest and boldest. That's all I can say!

Which of Taylor Swift’s videos have you seen, and how were they inspirational to you as a filmmaker? Are there artists in your country you’re finding equally inspirational?

All artists with authentic good work always influence me! They can be from my country or other countries, it doesn't matter! I respect all the artists all over the world who truly dedicated their whole life to creating the greatest aesthetic works!

As I said earlier, Madonna's “Bedtime Story” music video inspired me to use VFX in my short film. But here every time Taylor Swift extremely inspired me!

I and Taylor have a special kind of bond. We both have the same horoscope Sagittarius, and most of all what insulted us, we turned that into art, respect, and the biggest power! In my college days, one of my teachers used to bully me by calling me “Chashma (glasses)” for wearing glasses in my teenage. Even after that, in my university life, my classmates also did that. But now I turned my glasses into my major fashion style.

I saw that Taylor also did that to her! I think all people know about Kanye West and Kim's drama. Due to misunderstanding people started to call her a snake, and she came back like that in her Reputation album. She reflected her side of stories through music videos from that album. And, those music videos were the aid of my emotional bondage.

When she released the “Look What You Made Me Do” video, it touched my mind so greatly that I put the character “The Thorn” in my film. The character shows the energy to take a stand, the strength to fight back, the rage to destroy the demons, and the list goes on and on!

And yes, I must admit that a scene from her video “Ready For It” extremely inspired me to create something like that. It was an eye thing that started in the beginning. She put some sort of effect on her pupil to look like a futuristic robot. But in my film, I put the Milky Way thing on my pupil to create a universe in my eye.

These are not the only things; there are so many things on the list that encouraged me to make this film.

Ah! In my country, very few maybe two or three artists embraced avant-garde or dark art or symbolic art in their creations, and versatile artist and singer Mila is one of them! She is exceptional and I got that when I saw her music video “Naacho” where most artists are scared to take that risk. This is because here audiences are not used to seeing such kinds of things, though nowadays things are changing but very slowly. She effortlessly put avant-garde fashion and dark themes in her video. I think she is the only artist in early 2015 who dared to make that type of video where people don't know what is avant-garde! I am not a fan of her but I love only this music video, that's all!

I guess all may think why I too much talk about dark art and avant-garde! The only reason is, I love those, and all the time I love to put those in my works.

How many videos has Mila produced to this day and where can interested parties view them? How does her avant garde approach to videos make her stand out from others in her field?

Actually, I don't know the exact number. I only saw two of her videos those dragged my attention to her. Nowadays Mila is doing tours and stage performances. All know that she is rocking the music. I think most of her music videos are available on YouTube and Vimeo. People can also check the G-series YouTube channel, a leading music label in Bangladesh to which she has signed.

As long as I know, she did the avant-garde thing in only this "Naacho" music video. And that time she got major backlashed. The song is a kinda remixed version of our old folk song. She tried to do something different but people in here didn't appreciate that much! If she released the music video at this time, it would be a massive hit here and worldwide too.

Would you be interested in doing a video or film collaboration with Mila if you suddenly had the opportunity?

Well, if the project contains symbolism, metaphor, and avant-garde, definitely I would love to collaborate with her. Not only Mila, if any artists with quality stories want me to act in their films, then I will be lucky to work with them!

Do you have any ideas or things you’ve wanted to say for some time that you may base future movies on?

Lots of notions are spinning in my head all time. But my main focus is to portray social issues through my works that are seen by everyone but still ignored and taken as normal things. So, I want to be the voice of those oppressed mute people. Besides this, I want to make some movies on mental health for raising awareness and making people realize how much it is important to take care of their minds. I found that depression is the vile maggots and it came from Satan! Another thing I hope I will do in the future is I might make a film about my life so that people can get to know me. But the film will be silent and full of symbolism and metaphors. When people will able to decode the messages, everything will leave them with water in their eyes.

And of course, if I get a chance to make a movie about this industry, surely, I will do that to showcase the white side and black side of it. That's all I can say right now!

What kind of an impact would you like to have on the indie film industry in your country and abroad? What would you like to look back on at the conclusion of your film career?

The art world is the global village for artists! The form of art can be anything. If the art takes the form of rhythmic organized words, then it becomes writing. If it takes the form of compiled motion pictures, it becomes a movie. Whatever we do in this art world, our root is we all are artists. In the commandment of the art world, it is clearly mentioned that race, skin color, religion, country, gender, everything doesn't matter at all! The only thing matter is in which way the artistic mind expresses the thoughts.

In both indie film industries, I want to see a discrimination-free platform where everyone from different regions can work together. And I will try my best to make everyone in one space so that we can make something remarkable.

Ah! The conclusion of human work happens after death. After this, nobody can do anything to serve the world. But the works make the person memorable year after year.

Once one of my inspiring people Mother Teresa said, “I alone cannot change the world, but I can cast a stone across the waters to create many ripples.”

At the peak of my vulnerable stage, I would look back at how much I have done for people! Because all my works carry special messages that people can relate to their lives. The biggest achievement will be when people will remember me forever for my works, which could be films or writings! And, when they feel my work is motivating them to do something good, then I will feel that I am successful!

https://filmfreeway.com/SalmanAziz

-Dave Wolff

Interview with makeup artist and goth model Chinzyllah by Dave Wolff

Interview with makeup artist and goth model Chinzyllah

Asphyxium Zine: Your Instagram profile partly describes you as a “darkly inclined makeup enthusiast”. Can you elaborate on what such a statement is intended to mean?

Chinzyllah: For me, being darkly inclined is defined by one’s passionate connection to the darker aspects of life. I’m sure many would immediately identify me as a goth, but I prefer not to be limited to only one hue of darkness. I also draw much of my inspiration from the black metal musical genre. I’ve classified myself as a makeup enthusiast rather than a makeup artist, as I lack the formal training that’s usually required. Furthermore, I’ve never considered myself to be worthy of being recognized as a legitimate artist of any kind. Perhaps I’m more humble than what is healthy, but I just don’t agree with being appraised at a high value.”

Asphyxium Zine: Which of life’s darker aspects do you feel a connection with, and where does the passion for these connections come from? Did you feel these connections from a young age or did they develop over time?

Chinzyllah: The darkest aspect of life is death itself, as that is where life as we currently know it ends. There have been numerous occasions, mostly throughout my teenage years, where being smitten by death’s eternal embrace was almost fatal. I’ve felt the longing for death to claim my life since the age of twelve, which is also another way of saying that I’ve been coping with severe depression for about thirteen years. In saying that, I suppose my passion for life’s ultimate hue of darkness is sourced by my ever-evolving battle with depression.

Asphyxium Zine: Goth and black metal has more connotations today than in the past. These include a wider spectrum of colors, albeit all darker. How many different aspects of these aesthetics are you drawing from and/or creating?

Chinzyllah: For me, inspiration is born from a multitude of avenues that extend beyond musical genres or subcultural themes. Honestly, most of my creations start without blueprints; I just start mixing the ingredients on my face and allow nature to take its course until I deem it finished. Viewing the results of my efforts, some may find that hard to believe but it’s the absolute truth.

Asphyxium Zine: Are you a long time listener of black metal or did you discover it in later years? Is there any particular subgenre of black metal you resonate with? How many similarities, musical and/or visual, do you see between black metal and goth?

Chinzyllah: My ears tasted black metal for the very first time during my high school years, so I’ve been a listener of the genre for about a decade or so now. As a teenager, I decided that I wanted to practice LaVeyan Satanism to rebel against my Christian upbringing, Upon making this decision, I started doing research on Satanic worship music. During the Christian sermon structure, the musical component was always captivating for me. That being said, I just couldn’t envision a religion without music as I’d previously known music’s integral role within Christianity. Not long after beginning my search for Satan-praising musicians, I first happened upon Gorgoroth and was not disappointed with what I’d heard. Moving forward, there isn’t a black metal subgenre that I favour more over others; I enjoy just about anyone in the genre besides Burzum. I’ve personally never recognized any similarities between black metal and goth, as they are two entirely different entities both musically and aesthetically.

Asphyxium Zine: How much of your innermost emotions can you channel into your work without revealing too much of it? Where do you have to draw the line?

Chinzyllah: The amount of inward thoughts and emotions that I express through makeup is virtually limitless. Placing a cap on the emotional value of my looks hasn’t felt necessary, not yet anyway. I may not consider myself good enough to be dubbed as a “true” artist, but I recognize that whatever I create evokes a unique response from each viewer much like art does. Among my current viewership, accurate readings of what internal processes I’m externalizing through makeup has been an infrequent occurrence. With that in mind, expressing my true self with this particular method doesn’t make me feel vulnerable. Most don’t really pick up on how influential my subconscious is on my hand during each brushstroke, so there’s little concern for being too revealing.

Asphyxium Zine: Does improvising your designs without blueprints or pre-planning give you more room for expression? Is it too much for some to handle if they’re unfamiliar with black metal or goth?

Chinzyllah: Although it may not be the best approach for those with limited patience, it absolutely provides me with the freedom to authentically express myself. On average, the assemblage time for my makeup alone usually takes anywhere between two to four hours which has definitely helped with improving my patience over the years. As for my chosen presentation being too intense for some, that can be immediately confirmed by having me enter the local grocery store in my full form. I was born and raised within a small tourist town, so I’m sure you can imagine the many gawks and fearful mutterings I often receive based upon their beliefs in highly inaccurate stereotypes.

Asphyxium Zine: What about your Christian upbringing did you most want to rebel against? Are you still in that frame of mind or do you feel you have grown on your own terms since then?

Chinzyllah: As your typical angsty teenager, I just really wanted to rebel against my parents and their predetermined destiny for my life which had no consideration for the person I truly am. Looking back, nothing healthy ever came from trying to be one with their god growing up. My mother would regularly claim that I wouldn’t have had so many struggles in life had I just given Jesus more room within my heart and mind. Meanwhile, the large religious target placed upon my back during childhood predisposed me to over a decade’s worth of bullying and almost led me into a dysfunctional marriage years later. Although these negative experiences were indeed painful, I don’t think I’d be as well-equipped for life had it not been for those growing pains.

Asphyxium Zine: What kind of stereotypes have you dealt with, and how did religion play into them? In what ways was the left hand path an answer when it came to choosing your own path?

Chinzyllah: I’ve been met with several stereotypes throughout my existence, the most common being the goth stereotype. People who aren’t even vaguely familiar with the gothic subculture really let their ignorance shine through, when they make the assumption that I’m inherently evil due to the dark elements I adorn myself with. I understand that some folks are well-intended and are just trying to compliment my sense of style the way they know best; so I try to remain respectful in hopes of debunking that stereotype’s validity. When you throw religion into the mix, it becomes much more tiresome for me to acknowledge as most religious folk have perceived me as a missionary’s conquest. Venturing down the left path was necessary for my journey of self-discovery, it’s also what saved my life in a way. If I’d remained on the Christian road that I was brought up on, I don’t believe I would’ve been able to accept myself for who I truly am or feel anything besides shame.

Asphyxium Zine: How important a role, if any, do the mediums of music and film play in your self-expression?

Chinzyllah: Honestly, I’m not a huge movie buff. When the mood strikes, I enjoy classic horror films and well as select modern film series like Lord Of The Rings and Underworld. With how little I watch movies, or even just general television, I can’t say that the film industry has had a significant role in my daily life or the way I choose to express myself. On the other hand, music has definitely played a major role in my form of self-expression and shall continue to until there’s nothing left for me to express. When the music stops, so do I. Creating anything without the musical accompaniment to fuel me throughout the creative process, would be comparable to going on a deep sea dive without a breathing apparatus.

https://www.instagram.com/chinzyllah/

-Dave Wolff

Interview with Juan Pablo Breña Romero of Maze Of Terror and Hydra Art And Design by Dave Wolff

Interview with Juan Pablo Breña Romero of Maze Of Terror and Hydra Art And Design

Where is your design company Hydra Art And Design based? What was your purpose when you started it?

Hi my friend. I really thank you for this space. And a big hello to all the bangers that read this zine!!!! Hydra Art And Design is a design company I founded a few years ago, seeking to emulate the design quality of this new era when vintage and horror-deco predominate. So each CD, Booklet, Tape, Vinyl and T-shirt represents the extreme proposal of underground bands well. We have had the opportunity to make flyers for the Abadon Fest here in Lima, Peru, and made designs for Witchaven, Ruin, Omenfilth and Maze of Terror among others. We also support concerts and events in my city, and we are proud of this small contribution to the underground scene.

How long has Abadon Fest been an event in Peru? Does it receive publicity in zines or webzines outside your country?

Well, I did not organize the event. I was only part of the graphic art, as I see it are many months of a very strong effort until what I manage to perceive the comrades who organize it are masters!

Of course there is a lot of support, and as there are always great comments, it is a great event with great dedication and always the bands feel comfortable in the presentations.

Does Abadon Fest host local bands and bands from elsewhere in South America, or have bands from abroad played there?

Legendary bands like Nasty Savage, Sadistic Intent, Atrophy, Chakal have participated, also bands like Inquisicion, Warpath, Massive Power, Atomic Agressor from the neighboring country of Chile, bands like Reencarnacion de Colombia or Peruvian bands like Kranium, Mortuorio, Darken, our band Maze Of Terror, Sepulcro, Nightmare TMB have always participated with a quality sound in the events.

How many fliers has Hydra Art And Design done for Abadon Fest? How did you hear about this event and get in contact with the organizers?

We did flyers for the first two events and other events like Profanatica, and Morbosidad.

We played with my band Maze Of Terror on the first event, they are cool guys, we received a message when we return from Ecuador to join the event, after that they seek a designer and I do the work that was really cool, always grateful for that. I hope the next events to enjoy metal music after this situation of the pandemic is solved, soon great events will return!!!!

Is Peru home to many fests each year? What is the scene in Lima like as far as clubs, record stores, labels and zines go?

Here we have few bars, but two that I can mention are The Drone and Hensley where there are events every day of the week. In Peru there are few festivals, I can only think of Lima Metal Fest and Abadon Fest. Our scene is small but we have a large influx of bands that come here to give concerts. There are few venues but good sound engineers and equipment which makes many bands happy to play here because of the good equipment and sharp bangers that we have. There are good labels like Postarmagedon - Pentagram, Inti Records that are assorted with good underground material. Also small distributors that are in charge of spreading material, all the good CDs always arrive here!!!

Who are the sound engineers who help bands for their performances?

We are small and don’t have any special supporters to play live. But In Lima we usually have friends in sound to help us like Rula from El Sotano or Paul Pinto from Quarter Note. Each time they do sound they help us make a great performance.

Do metal festivals held In Peru get publicity in North America and Europe? Would you like to see these events and the local bands who play there have more exposure?

I really love the idea to the people know how good a place Peru is for a show; good people, good metal, great food, great equipment. I knew people to visit Peru and would certify that, I think we still need the events and festivals in Peru to be even more publicized so that people know about the good work that is done here and also to get even bigger bands to come to these parts, they will not regret it!!!, I hope that too you can help me with it, my brother!!!

How often does Maze Of Terror have the opportunity to perform at metal festivals in Peru? Is the band active in the local club scene there?

The truth is that we have only performed for the Abadon Fest. We have not yet had the pleasure of performing at other festivals in Peru, maybe later I will have the opportunity. We have participated in other festivals outside of Peru, in Bolivia and Ecuador, always with the spirit above!!!!

Name some of the festivals in Bolivia and Ecuador where Maze Of Terror played. How did the scenes there compare to your home country?

We played in Bolivia at a festival called In Satanam Meis and opened for Pentagram. Another festival I remember was one in Ecuador opening for the band Ente for his 25th anniversary. It was really cool; we knew good people and musicians that played there for the first time like us.

Are you one of the founding members of Maze Of Terror? Does it help the band to have a graphic artist as a member of the band?

I am a founding member. The truth is it always helps a lot to be able to have control over that part of the work, to be able to save time, and above all to express in the right way, the perspective and power of the band!

Your Facebook community page displays the artwork designed by your company. Name a handful of the bands you designed for and how you got in touch with them?

Peru has a small scene. It is easy to contact bands. You only go to a bar or event and talk with guys. I usually do metal flyers and work with so many guys. I do flyers for shows of every band here at some point. I do work for bands in other countries like, Ruin, Omenfilth, SS and Baphomet etc. I love the idea of doing work for more bands outside my country.

How long has Maze Of Terror been active and how much material is available from them? Describe how the band got together.

The band was born with a concept worked by Leviathan (me) and Hammer in 2011. We had the idea to do an extreme thrash metal band with a powerful style and polished sound. We have been active for nine years. We have an EP “Skullcrusher” (2012), an album “Ready to Kill” (2016), a split ”Death for our Rivals” with Witchaven, another split with Amken, the EP “Evoked Black Souls” a demo “Death Worshipers”, a split “Savage Warlords” with Wolfstorm, and a second album coming soon, “Offer to the Fvcking Beasts”.

Considering how small local bands are in Peru, how easy it is to meet fans and form bands over there? Does promotion come as easy to bands in Peru? Does snail mail or social media help more in that regard?

It’s easy form a band in Perú play and promote inside of my country, is a little bit difficult in South America, but really difficult obviously in the world, is because exist so many bands, is because we play only for love to metal, we use more the media than Youtube, Facebook and Bandcamp to promote our music and concept, and is really util!!!! , but I think the greatest goal is play in live to other countries, we work on that.

Are the bands you released splits with based in Peru or other countries? Did you come into contact with those bands through advertising and correspondence?

generally not even we do a split with an Peruvian band is because we try to use the distance to promote themselves and ourselves in their countries, but we usually likes be part of compilations, we do constantly, and we are always able to share beers contacts and time with our friends, we use only the media to contact other bands, usually our splits are proposals of the producers of the same, we like the idea of share music with people of so many countries.

Do most Peruvian and South American bands have their own studios where they record? How do those brands achieve such a raw sound on their recordings? How much does the equipment have to do with it?

Usually is more technique than equipment, more gain, the style of the drums, the scales, are more darker, the voices, we think more in strong than perfection, but is not easy, we need so much force, and the inspiration os malevolence to do the things correctly, is part of the herency of the first South American bands, is more inspiration and the riffs than the equipment, is because the sound is part of different countries at this continent.

How long did it take to compile a full band after you and Hammer started out? Did you want to find musicians with interest in the same bands with similar amounts of passion to write thrash metal? What bands do all the band members listen to?

Well it really takes a long time because each song is made to be a world apart, not necessarily to form an album or another, and also we always try to use different scales and different historical or literary concepts,

We always try to show the bands that we like to new members so that they understand the concept and techniques to use, obviously each genre has very different things from attack or fingering, scales and others, bands that really inspire us, I could tell you bands like Sepultura, Vulcano, Whiplash, Venom, Desaster, Metallica, Infernal Majesty and Slayer are important to get into what we do but above all we always look for a new sound within what we do.

How long does it usually take to complete an EP, split or full length? Are you generally pleased with your sound and production?

Our idea is not to delay too much in the productions to minimize the time to a minimum, but concerts, tours, study times sometimes take work, what we try is to do things in parallel, for example work albums together with Eps so that it flows from the productions are constant, for example it took us two years to finish the new album but in parallel we will launch an ep with new songs, a little before or after along with reissues and tours that we did between 2016 and 2017 and important concerts between 2018 and 2019.

Is Maze Of Terror signed to an independent label or are your EPs and full lengths self-released?

Our current deal is with Xtreem Records for the second album, they are helping us a lot and they are extremely kind and nice with us, we are happy about it, Dave Rotten is a nice guy!!!, usually each production goes by a different label, we have not yet signed permanently with a label, but we do not rule out joining a permanent one later.

How many bands inside and outside Peru have you designed artwork for to date?

For example Ruin, Maze of Terror, Witchaven, Baphomet, SS, Omen Filth, but to be honest I only have contact with the labels usually, they contact me as well.

Are you a self-educated artist or did you attend any art schools before you started?

I self-educated in everything my friend, mistakes are the best masters hahahaha, internet helps always to learn some things but I really need to learn so much things.'

Were you and the members of Maze Of Terror around during the 80s thrash era or did you discover the bands sometime after? What most appeals to you about that era?

Well I have 35 years, my generation is about 2000, everything in the 80s is pure love, NWOBHM, South American death thrash, black metal. The 80s are for me as the mythological era for the romans, but we try always to see from the future I see tons of bands in this era that would make proud to be an 80s banger.

How did you hook up with Xtreem Records to promote and distribute your second full length?

They contacted us, and we are glad with it, honestly this just start, our cover art is on works, after this we will shoot our first bullet, we are really happy with it.

Is Hydra Art & Design doing the cover artwork for the new Maze Of Terror album? How much of the cover is complete?

Not, this time the cover art will be made by Karl Dahmer a magnificent artis that do works for bands like Exhumed, Midnight etc, they do the also cover art for our split with Witchaven , I hope we get the cover soon.

Do you have a title in mind for the new album? How many songs do you intend to include on it?

The title of the album will be "Offer to the Fucking Beasts" this will have 10 songs, that soon I will show you my friend.

If the next album generates enough exposure for the band, will you be staying with Xtreem Records for future releases?

I dont know really but would be great !, for the moment our plan is keep doing new releases like new Eps, before start a third album, but we will do it so much faster than this one, we are really happy to launch this the album with Xtreem Records.

http://www.facebook.com/HydraArtandDesign

http://www.facebook.com/mazeofterrorthrash

-Dave Wolff

Interview with photographer Amanda Roach by Devin Joseph Meaney

Interview with photographer Amanda Roach by Devin Joseph Meaney

1. Hello Amanda. We are known to each other, but please introduce yourself and your work to our readers!

Hi, my name is Amanda Roach. I was born and raised in Cape Breton, Nova Scotia. I am a full-time clerk typist at our main hospital. Most of the time I am a fully energetic human who enjoys reading, exercising, hiking, snowshoeing, random adventures, and most recently, taking nature pictures.

2. How long have you been interested in photography? And what inspires you to snap such stunning photos?

I never in my life was one for pictures but as my life had done a full 360 and my world turned completely upside down I had only two choices. 1. Lay down, give up, and let life take the better of me, or 2. Woman up, take action and change my life. Within a day I chose option two. I am a fighter and a worrier and I would not let these unforeseen circumstances ruin my life. As soon as I made that decision (August 5th, 2020 to be exact) I found myself enjoying things that I once would roll my eyes at. I went on my first hike alone. Ever. I saw life and beauty in everything that surrounded me. I cried the whole hike and I kept snapping pictures. I was mesmerized by the fresh air, the trees, the grass, the way the sun beamed off of everything. I felt excitement in all that was around and I couldn't wait to look at the beauty I snapped and share it with my Facebook friends and those that follow me on Instagram.

3. What type of pictures do you like to take the most? Do you prefer summer, fall, or winter settings? Or a combination of all those things together?

Nature, nature, nature. All the photos that I take are pictures of nature. I don't have a preference. I love taking photos of the ice forming on branches, the fall colors on the trees, the most imperfect/perfectly formed shell/sea glass, and every waterfall I can find. This will be my first year hiking all year round.

4. Aside from photography... what other creative mediums spark your interest?

Due to my life before Aug 5th, 2020 I never felt like I was my true authentic self and I was always fighting to find her. It wasn't until the unforeseen circumstances appeared (which turned out to be the best thing that could have happened to me) that I found my love of taking photos of nature. I cannot answer this question due to the fact it has only been a few short months that I have actually felt alive and not just here in existence. Unfortunately, this question will have to wait as my process and life unfolds and the self I am intended to become more alive and willing to explore more areas. Thank you for understanding.

5. What message would you like to send with your art? And what type of person do you think would appreciate your work?

I take my nature pictures to show that there is beauty and love all around us, all the time. I take them to show that no matter what life throws at us, we can all take a breath, capture that beauty, and know that, that beauty is within us too. 

I believe that those who are intuitive, those who relate to nature, those who are lightworkers, and those with the zen of life within them would appreciate my photographs.

6. Is light work something that intrigues/inspires you? Tell us more!

Light work is new to me as well but I find it very inspiring. I feel very deeply and passionately about everything and everyone I care about to the point that if something happens to someone I can literally feel it as if it was happening to me. It even prevents me from watching certain shows/movies, etc. This gift (sometimes a hard pill to digest) I've come to know is part of being a lightworker so as my life unveils I feel that part of my purpose is to also work as a lightworker when the path is ready when I am ready.

7. You manage to get amazing shots on just your phone. Do you have any plans to purchase a professional camera?

Yes, I would like to someday invest in a camera. There are so many angles I would like to take but am unable to with my phone. However, I am pleased with what my phone currently offers. I may even try to get a tripod for my phone first.

8. Do you have any intentions to take a more formal approach? As in... do you plan to take any photography courses?

Not currently. I've come to realize that when I make something I enjoy anything more than that, I lose my love and passion for it. 

For example, I loved yoga. I took my YTT 200 and I left feeling like I had learned nothing. I have not done yoga since. I lost all respect and love for it. It may come back someday but I try to go with the flow. If I love it, I will do it but I won't turn anything into something that makes my brain feel like "I have to do this"... it just becomes a chore and I no longer enjoy it.

9. What inspires you to live your life? Aside from nature, I mean.

In October 2015 I almost lost my dad when he was T-boned and had his neck broken. The doctor said he should be dead. It woke me up and put a fear into me that I am here for more than the purpose to exist. Even, if I don't currently know what that purpose is. Being alive inspires me to live my life. Life is too short and I don't know if I will wake up tomorrow. I want to live each day even if it is only for 5 minutes sitting on my step with a tea breathing in the fresh air.

10. Lastly... tell me (and the readers) something positive and/or inspirational... to end on a good note!

This quote: "I like people who get excited about the change of seasons, the sound of the ocean, watching a sunset, the smell of rain and starry nights". ~~Brooke Hampton

    

11. Any final comments?

That saying "we only live once"...

No! We only die once, we live Every. Fucking. Day. So live it the best way you can!

Try, one minute at a time. Just try.

Thanks Amanda! :3

-Devin Joseph Meaney

Amanda Roach on Facebook

Interview with suspension artist CHAD HUXTABLE by Kelly Tee

Interview with suspension artist CHAD HUXTABLE hailing from Australia

Human or body suspension art is the act of suspending oneself from a large hook that is placed through the skin by way of provisional body piercings. Body suspension is a tradition that dates back thousands of years and historically was strictly performed for sacred and ritualistic purposes.

Today, the art of body suspension continues and is fast becoming an addiction and or lifestyle for people who partake in this art form. I caught up with Chad Huxtable who hails from Adelaide, Australia to learn more about this art and its attraction the pain and exhilaration of it all to feed my curiosities and interests with what is often a misunderstood physical and mental virtuosity.

Hi Chad, thanks for speaking with me. The first thing that pops into a lot of people's minds when they see what is known as the art of body or human suspension without understanding the process of this incredible performance art is why? Why do you do this?

Hi, Kel. The reason why I do body suspension, plain and simple, is that I love it. It started by a friend offering it to me; I thought he was joking and a few days later he reminded me and had organized the hooks and stuff for me. At the time I thought that maybe if I didn't like it then it would be an interesting story, but I liked it and now it's become a bit like therapy. The "why" I do this is a hard question to answer because it's always different for each suspension. Some are like therapy for me, to help ease up things like depression. Others are just for fun and a good way to see friends and be around other people with the same interests, while other suspensions are performance pieces for events or art installations. However, the main reason I do it is the rush and the following come-down.

What does body suspension mean for you on a personal level?

Body suspension for me on a personal level is the therapy side of it. A few hours later I will get emotional, almost like a hyper sense of each emotion and within that rush of emotion. There's a clarity that follows and helps me to understand more within myself. Weirdly, sometimes I get some precognition and my body will tell me what I will need after the suspension and sometimes that will be that I need to isolate myself and work through it. Sometimes it'll be going out, just being around random people and living in the moment, and sometimes it'll be that I need to go see a specific friend and spend some time with them. Each time my body tells me what I need to do and it's always been right.

Aside from finding this fascinating, I do think ‘OUCH, that must hurt and how does your skin not rip?’. Therefore, how do you manage through the pain and what sort of preparation do you do for your skin, mind, and body to endure a suspension ritual?

I always get asked about it hurting and how does your skin not rip. Our skin is extremely tough and the hooks are put in fairly deep, there is always micro-tearing but it's a part of the risk. For my body suspensions, I work with Icarus Body Suspension who is a fully qualified piercer, and the person I work with and trust every time.

The preparation is usually a good night's sleep, a healthy breakfast, lots of water, and I don't drink any caffeine or alcohol (heavily the night before). No blood thinners or medication like aspirin. The mental preparation that I do is different for each suspension. My last suspension was called an O-ki-pa which is two points in the chest, making it a rather difficult suspension. The mental preparation beforehand was kind of meditating for about half an hour while Icarus prepped the hooks, table, and other parts needed and listening to a band called Heilung (pagan folk music) while allowing my mind to wander and standing in the sun. As for the skin, it's quite stretchy so of course, the piercing sites are prepped with a sterilizing agent and once the hooks are in, and I'm roped up, I lean back to stretch out my chest and the skin that is being used for the suspension readying for what is to come.

What attracted you to try this form of art and body endurance and when did it all start for you?

I met Zara from Icarus Body Suspension through a theatrical horror maze we were both acting as scarers in the maze in 2016. We became friends and he came out to one of the shows my band was playing in after we became friends.

It’s a really funny story. I was playing a show in town with my old band and Zara knew at least one member from each band in the show. I got to talking to him about body suspension as I'd seen it on his Facebook before, he said to me "You know there's always a fresh set of hooks there for ya" which I laughed at and about two days later he sent me a message saying that he wasn't joking, so I said "Fuck it! Hook us up" (literally how the conversation went). About two months after that first conversation I had my first suspension. The first suspension was two years ago, in March of 2017.

The reason I did it first was more of a 'why not try something new', and if nothing else I would have a story and some cool photos to show. Little did I know that I would fall in love with it. The emotional clarity that suspension provides me is probably what hooked me most after the first one. Since then I've used it to clear the mess from my mind and engage in a living art form.

What is the healing process after you have been pierced for suspension? Have you ever had any complications from the severe piercings?

The healing process is about four to six weeks. Usually some slight bruising occurs, but the holes are just like that for a piercing and don't need any stitching. The first couple of nights can be a bit painful to sleep in certain positions, depending on where the suspension points were. The only complications I've ever had happened with my poor preparation (as in I drank quite heavily the night before, not enough water, only three hours of sleep and not a proper breakfast). All of those elements caused me some severe bleeding.

From what I can see, you are hooked through your skin and then hooked onto a suspension device. How do you get hooked? Do the piercings take place well before a suspension or then and there before you are suspended?

The piercer marks out where the suspension points are going to go (like getting a regular piercing). Then a large needle or what we call 'sharps' is placed on the end of the hook (whether it's a Gilson or a fishhook style) and pierced through the skin. Most of the time the piercings are done on the spot, just before you get suspended, however, for shows and exhibitions you can get pierced a couple of hours beforehand.

What is the biggest misconception people tend to have around the art of body suspension?

A common misconception is that it's a sexual thing, which I can say in my case is not correct. While it’s not sexual for me, it can be for some. Personally, it’s a spiritual and/or fun experience.

One of the smaller misconceptions is that your skin will tear. I've had 180kg on four hooks in my skin hasn't ripped and I've also pulled a truck and a car at the same time from two points in my back and never had the skin rip. There is, however, still a very slim chance of tearing. For me though, so far things have been solid.

What is the body suspension community like in Adelaide? Is it growing?

We're a pretty small hook family in Adelaide, but always welcoming to people who want to try or get back into it. I'm not sure if it's growing or not, but we'll continue to do it for as long as we can (smiles).

They're by no means exclusive to the body suspension community, anyone is welcome to come out and watch or try (with personal discretion). I haven't heard of any events or festivals specific for body suspension but a few events have gotten into contact with us about performing.

How regularly do you suspend and what is the best element of body suspension for you and the worst?

If I could suspend every weekend I would, but I usually suspend probably about once every one to two months. The best element of body suspension would probably be the absolute lack of thought when I'm up on the hooks and the clarity of mind that it provides me for the following days.

The worst part of body suspension: it's a hard question because I can't think of anything bad about it. For me (and this is a personal one) I hate when Zara squirts me with the saline solution after he's taken the hooks out. No idea why, but it makes me squeal worse than when the hooks are going in.

How would you describe how this art/ritual works for you? Fun, meditative, or a gratifying emotional release? And does the position of your suspension play a role in the outcome of how the process affects you?

I would describe it as all three, it's an extremely fun day and can manifest a massive emotional response and it can be a quiet occasion.

Yes, and no, the harder the suspension is the more extreme the emotional response has been in previous suspensions. However, I've never had the same effect from the same suspension position twice. Different positions can be easier or harder, the easiest I find is what's known as a 'suicide suspension' which is from the top of your back, or the Faulkner which is from the knees.

What would you say to people who react negatively to this ritualistic performance art, calling it dangerous, sickening and self-destructive?

The easiest response is always 'my body, my choice' but for those who care to listen I explain why I do this, sometimes I'm greeted with curiosity, and then understanding. one of the funniest ones I ever had was back when I was single and I was on tinder: a girl matched with me just to ask me what was wrong with me, my response was 'nothing, I've been tested', she asked, 'what does it prove?' and I knew what she was probing for so I decided to play along, "It proves nothing but I just do it for the sick sexual thrill" and left it at that.

Is the art of body suspension on the rise? Is it becoming more mainstream? And if so, why do you think this is?

I think it is becoming a bit more mainstream because today's society is becoming more open-minded towards different or divergent art forms such as body suspension. With that open-mind mentality, people are willing to look past first judgments. I think it also has something to do with today's youth growing up in a more accepting and communicative world, and how we now have the ease of ability to connect with others who have similar likes and passions to ourselves.

To anyone considering body suspension, what would you say to them?

I'd say do it. It's a lot of fun, but if you have your mindset on a certain position, do that one first. If you end up hating it you'll always have photos of you in your dream position and who knows you might find a new addiction. I would recommend at least coming and watching or experiencing it with a trusted group around you.

Thanks so much for your time Chad, it’s been an interesting chat and good insight into this extreme form of art.

No worries Kelly, thank you for the interest. Hopefully, see you at the next metal festival in Adelaide or Sydney.

Icarus Body Suspension on Instagram

-Kelly Tee

Visit Kelly Tee’s Black Metal Reviews on Facebook. -DW